OVERHEARD: Dynasty Brunch

30 Sep

This past Sunday brunch, I was a witness to the most impressive order regarding eggs, that I’ve heard to date. It was delivered by a Grande Dame in her late sixties. She was real blue money, with real fake red hair, straight out of the late ’80’s soap Dynasty. (For a good time, check out this classic catfight from the show).

She thought I was writing down her detailed order, but really I was just jotting down the gold that was spinning from her mouth:

“My friend, I will probably like this omlette with lamb sausage, but, can I do it without the onions, without the tomatoes, -AND- with goat cheese instead of the gruyere -AND- no creme fraiche, -AND- the merguez extra well done? -AND- Can it be firm, but, not too firm? OH, -AND- with Canadian (Is it actually Canadian?) bacon? If it’s not real Canadian bacon how much would it cost to take it off? Do you know? And if they can take it off, make sure it’s one not two eggs; I haven’t eater anything all day.”

The order to the kitchen, looked something like this:

Table 72, TheInsideWaiter

MERGUEZ OMELETTE

-ONE EGG

-NO ONIONS

-NO TOMATOES

-NO GRUYERE

-SUB GOAT CHZ

-NO CRM FRAICHE

-SAUSAGE XWELL

-FIRM

-SEE SERVER

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2 Responses to “OVERHEARD: Dynasty Brunch”

  1. Banquet Manager October 1, 2010 at 2:27 am #

    Thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment.

  2. Anonymous October 1, 2010 at 3:46 pm #

    hilarious. after all that, still the “see server” tops it off.

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